Lovely Quotes

A closed mouth gathers no foot. - My Dad

Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit. - My Mom

I’ll lift you and you lift me and we'll both ascend together. - John Greenleaf Whittier

If you ever get lonely you just go to the record store and visit your friends. - Penny Lane

And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud became more painful than the risk it took to blossom. – Anais Nin

This is my simple religion. There is no need for temples; no need for complicated philosophy. Our own brain, our own heart is our temple; the philosophy is kindness. - Dalai Lama

When the student is ready, the master appears. - Buddhist Proverb

Whatever you look for in others tends to rise to the surface. - Unknown

If you’re smilin with the cosmos the motherfuckin cosmos is smiling back at ya. - Chris Robinson

Let us rise up and be thankful, for if we didn't learn a lot today, at least we learned a little, and if we didn't learn a little, at least we didn't get sick, and if we got sick, at least we didn't die; so, let us all be thankful. - Buddha

August 22, 2012

Driving while Sandwiching

Yesterday morning I was on my way to work driving down the highway and I noticed the guy in the car in front of me reach over and pull a piece of bread out of a loaf.  So of course, I became totally fixed on what this cat was up to.   I then watched him pull a second piece of bread out of the loaf, all the while looking down at his lap, doing what I can only imagine is making a fucking sandwich!  Can you believe that shit?  Making a sandwich while driving 65 mph!  I was floored.

I then began to wonder what kind of sandwich it was.  What would be the easiest sandwich to make while operating a vehicle?  PB & J?  Nah, too many jars.  Bologna with mayo?  Turkey and ham?  Was there cheese involved?

WTF is the world coming to when someone thinks it's okay to make a sandwich in the car? Now, I would be a complete LIAR if I said I didn't text or put on make up or mess with my iPod while I'm driving.  I know.  Terrible.  I just think a sandwich is a bit ridiculous.  Making a margarita would have been way more acceptable.

And then, just to show how awesome this guy really was, he did the "what the fuck?" hand gesture out his window to the FL Highway Patrol cars parked on the side of the road! Again, another gasp comes from my mouth as I'm watching this total jack ass be, well, a total jack ass.  I thought for sure Johnny Law was gonna come after him and give him a ticket for being so angry and then quite possibly get a free meal from the whole deal.

Speaking of free meals...I'm going to Dave and Busters tomorrow for a work event and I'm going to eat all the free food and drink all the free booze I can get my greedy little hands on. I'm also going to beat House of Dead.  I did it last year and I'm going to do it again. I am quite excited about it really.

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